|God Is A DJ|
|Season 3, Episode 16|
|Air date||October 9, 2012|
The Definitive Editions: Face Down
The Definitive Editions: Truth or Dare
God Is A DJ is the sixteenth episode of Season 3 of JamesonOTP's ongoing fan fiction, Glee: The Next Generation, and the sixtieth episode overall. It is a tribute to P!nk and was released as the first of two artist tributes for the season.
As Lana adjusts to life back at McKinley and comes to a sort-of resolution with her family, tensions rise in Glee Club. Jaxon feels that New Directions is about to come crashing down and that all their dreams with die with it. As Miles finds himself returning to his pre-New Directions ways, the whole situation causes a rift in New Directions that threatens to turn friends against friends. Meanwhile, as Adam and Nicole come to terms with their kiss and what it means for them, Adam finds help for his cutting issue in an unlikely place.
- Get The Party Started by P!nk. Sung by New Directions
- Feel Good Time by P!nk feat. William Orbit. Sung by Evan Marx
- Funhouse by P!nk. Sung by Jaxon Pierce
- Don't Let Me Get Me by P!nk. Sung by James Holland
- Trouble by P!nk. Sung by Taylor Atkinson, Ana Watson, Aldy Williams, Miles Larson, and Natasha Leonard
- God Is A DJ by P!nk. Sung by Hallie Grace
- Most Girls by P!nk. Sung by Bella James
- M!ssunderztood by P!nk. Sung by Adam Gray and Nicole Martin
- So What by P!nk. Sung by Lana Addison and Miles Larson
- Blow Me (One Last Kiss) by P!nk. Sung by Lana Addison and Nicole Martin
- 18 Wheeler by P!nk. Sung by Miles Larson, Hallie Grace, Lana Addison, Jaxon Pierce, and James Holland
Glee: The Next Generation Season 3, Episode #16: "God Is A DJ"Edit
So here’s what you missed on Glee: The Next Generation:
Dillon’s abuse of Nicole was taken to a whole new level when he pushed her at Dalton and she got hurt. Adam, Miles, and Evan wanted to fight back, but Mr. Schue convinced them to do it in song. After paying a visit to Dalton to find Dillon, Adam and Nicole finally had to face their feelings for each other. New Directions managed to trick Dillon into meeting them and they tore him apart in musical form. Lana had all she could take with her family issues, and upon returning to McKinley she was treated like a joke, so she climbed to the roof and said her goodbyes. Luckily, New Directions and friends found her and after Hallie sang a heartfelt song to her, begging her not to jump, she stepped away from the ledge. Now, the question on everyone’s minds is, how will New Directions deal with everything that’s happened and will everything be alright?
And that’s what you missed on Glee!
Will smiled from ear from ear as he placed the boom box on a stool in the middle of the choir room. He pressed the play button and “Gangnam Style” by Psy began to play. Almost the entire Glee Club groaned.
“Oh come on,” Will said. “This could be a fun song to do.”
“Mr. Schue,” Ana said, raising her hand. “There are only six words of that entire song that we can understand and pronounce. ‘Oppa Gangnam style’ and ‘hey sexy lady.’ What’s the point?”
“Jumping off that roof is sounding better and better,” Lana said.
“Quick,” Aldy said, plugging his ears. “Kill it before it lays eggs.”
“Ugh,” Bella said. “I thought this fad ended like five years ago.”
Will rolled his eyes. “We could do an all dance number, guys. Think outside of the box.”
“Ooh,” Kevin said. “Quesadillas.”
“Seriously?” Natasha asked. “If we wanted to just dance, we’d join Dance Club. This is Glee Club and I want to sing and I sure as hell don’t wanna sing ‘Gangnam Style,’ that’s for sure.”
Will rolled his eyes. “Then what do you guys want to perform? Let’s hear your thoughts.”
“How about we perform some Pink?” Bella asked. “She’s cool, she’s talented, she’s edgy, and not to mention, she’s relevant to us.”
“I like that idea,” Rose said. “We don’t do enough edgy and spunky female singers in Glee Club. She has my vote.”
“All in favor?” Will asked.
Everyone raised their hands except for Aldy. He instead crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair, looking unimpressed.
“Do you have an issue performing Pink?” Will asked Aldy.
“Of course,” Aldy said. “Women like her get on my nerves, Mr. Schue. She acts like she’s so good because she’s a strong-minded woman. Girls like that just need to learn their place.”
“That is so incredibly sexist,” Nicole said.
“And just what is our place?” Bella asked.
“You know,” Aldy said. “It’s in the kitchen, cleaning the house, or making our babies. Women don’t need to be strong and independent. That’s a man’s job.”
Rose shook her head. “I can’t believe you just said that.”
“Aldy, that sexist talk has no place in this classroom,” Sue said. “Quite frankly, not only am I disgusted at you, I’m ashamed to been seen in the same room as you.”
“Moving on,” Will said. “You guys wanna perform some Pink, then if you know the song, how about you guys come up and join in?”
“I’m so excited,” Bella said.
“Guys,” Will said, turning to face the band. “Play us in please.”
The music began as most of New Directions got up and danced to the front of the choir room. Aldy shook his head in disbelief.
“I'm coming up so you better get this party started,” all of New Directions, with the exception of Aldy, sang. “I'm coming up so you better get this party started.”
“Get this party started on a Saturday night,” Bella sang. “Everybody's waiting for me to arrive.”
“Sending out the message to all of my friends,” Rose sang. “We'll be looking flashy in my Mercedes Benz.”
“I got lot of style, check my gold diamond rings,” Taylor sang. “I can go for miles if you know what I mean.”
“I'm coming up so you better get this party started,” New Directions sang. “I'm coming up so you better get this party started.”
“Pumping up the volume, breaking down to the beat,” Evan sang. “Cruising through the west side, we'll be checking the scene.”
“Boulevard is freakin' as I'm comin' up fast,” Miles sang. “I'll be burning rubber, you'll be kissing my ass."
“Pull up to the bumper, get out of the car,” Jaxon sang. “License plate says stunner, number one superstar.”
“I'm coming up so you better get this party started,” New Directions sang. “I'm coming up so you better get this party started, get this party started.”
“Making my connection as I enter the room,” Ana sang. “Everybody's chilling as I set up the groove.”
“Pumping up the volume with this brand new beat,” Honey sang. “Everybody's dancing and they're dancing for me.”
“I'm your operator, you can call anytime,” Natasha sang. “I'll be your connection to the party line.”
“I'm coming up so you better get this party started,” New Directions sang. “I'm coming up so you better get this party started. I'm coming up so you better get this party started. I'm coming up so you better get this party started.”
“Get this party started,” James sang. “Get this party started right now.”
“Get this party started,”New Directions sang.
“Get this party started,” Kevin sang. “Get this party started right now.”
Will smiled as New Directions laughed and applauded. “Love the energy guys.”
Aldy rolled his eyes. “Whatever.”
“Um, as fun as that song was, Mr. Schue, I have to say this,” Hallie said. “Glee Club isn’t all fun and games anymore. Life isn’t one big dance number.”
“I agree, Mr. Schue,” Jaxon said. “Since what’s happened with Nicole and Lana, nothing is the same. I hate to say it, but Glee Club is on its last legs.”
“No,” Will said. “This Glee Club is very much alive and going strong. You guys just have to have faith. It’s really hard to keep the faith when life throws so much at you and the ones you love, but we’ll prevail, like always.”
“Confucius also say ‘you have a butt chin’,” Sue said as Will rolled his eyes.
“I think the key here,” Will said, ignoring Sue, “is to focus on getting ready for Regionals and to focus on paying tribute to Pink.”
“We’re gonna fall apart before Regionals” Jaxon said. “We should just give up, Mr. Schue.”
Jaxon grabbed his backpack and headed out the door, leaving everyone stunned. Evan stood up and chased after Jaxon, finally stopping him in the hall.
“Jaxon, wait,” Evan said. “What you said in there, you know that’s not true. You’re amazing, Jaxon. You’re a great leader and whenever we doubt ourselves, you’re always there with a great speech to reinvigorate our belief in Glee Club and ourselves. You can’t give up.”
“Evan,” Jaxon said, turning to face him. “Glee Club has been one big drag this whole year. From my dad dying, to your beating, Miles’ stepfather, Lana’s family issues, Nicole’s abuse—there has been no happiness in that Glee Club. You remember what Mr. Schue said. ‘That by its very definition, glee is about opening oneself up to joy.’ Well, how can you have a Glee Club without glee?”
“I get what you’re saying,” Evan said. “But remember magic week? How for one week, everything felt magical again because we believed that singing about magic would give us that magic back? Maybe if we wanna have fun again, we need to sing about fun and believe that it will bring the fun back. So, do me a favor and come to Glee Club tomorrow. I’ll have something prepared that will do just that.”
Jaxon nodded. “Okay, deal. I’ll be there.”
“Shake on it?” Evan asked, extending his hand. Jaxon took Evan’s hand and shook it.
Lana sat in the Grays’ living room as she was surrounded by Callie, Alysia, Lynsay, Wyatt, Sr., Wyatt, Janice, Abbie, and Adam. Wyatt, Sr. cleared his throat.
“I’m asking you, Lana,” he said. “What do you want.”
“I don’t wanna live with Callie,” Lana said. “She is way too overbearing, she makes me feel worthless, and she controls when and how I see Hallie. But I don’t wanna live with Alysia, either. I know she doesn’t want me there, I don’t really know her, and I think she disagrees with my sexuality.”
“We’ve already told Lana she’s welcome here,” Janice said. “As long as it’s okay with all of you. I don’t wish to overstep my bounds.”
“You already have,” Callie said.
“That’s enough, Callie,” Wyatt, Sr. said. “You’ve already managed to push Lana away. Don’t completely ruin what little relationship we have with her.”
“I would like to stay here,” Lana said. “Mrs. Gray and Mrs. Peters-Gray treat me like a daughter, they’re really nice to me, and they accept me for who I am.”
“Lana, if this is what you want, then it’s what you’ll get,” Wyatt, Sr. replied. “I love you like my daughter, Lana. I’ve raised you since you were a baby. Nothing is gonna change that for me. So, I’m going to let you keep your credit card and your allowance. It’s yours to spend as you wish. Callie will no longer dictate that. However, there is a catch: when I’m home, and on holidays, I would like to see you. And I still want to be able to call you and talk to you because you are still my daughter. So if you don’t cut me out of your life, and agree to that, you can keep your allowance.”
Lana smiled. “Of course, Dad.”
Wyatt walked over and hugged Lana. He held her close and planted a kiss on her forehead.
Jaxon walked into Glee Club, facing everyone for the first time after he walked out the day before. Evan smiled at him as he walked inside and took a seat.
“Alright, guys,” Will said. “Are you guys ready to continue our Pink lesson? I believe that Evan said he had a song that he would like to perform.”
“Correct, Mr. Schue,” Evan said as he got up and walked to the front of the choir room.
Evan took off his button up shirt to reveal a red mesh muscle shirt. He grabbed a white biker jacket and put it on, then pulled a pair of aviators out of the pocket, and put them on.
“Cue the music,” he told the band.
“Wow,” Bella said. “Evan’s actually kind of hot once he ditches the preppy clothes.”
Claude glared at Bella, crossing his arms.
“Do do do do do do,” Evan sang. “Do do do do do do. We go where we like, we got overtime, we get paid to rattle our chains. We go in the back, paint our money black, spend it on the enemy. Sleeping in the church, riding in the dirt, put a banner over my grave. Make a body work, make a beggar hurt, sell me something big and untamed.”
Evan jumped up on a set of chairs and began to dance on them as he sang.
“Now our time, real good time,” he sang. “Now our time, a real good time. Now our time, said now our time, a real good time. It’s a really good time, baby of mine. We know how to pray, party every day, make our desolation look plain. Riding in a rut, till the power’s cut, we don’t even have a good name. Sleeping in the church, riding in the dirt,
put a banner over my grave.”
As Evan stood on the chairs, he took off his biker jacket and threw it aside. The girls whistled as Bella got up and shoved a dollar in Evan’s waistband. Will covered his face with his hand and shook his head. Claude looked infuriated.
“Make a body work, make a beggar hurt, sell me something big and untamed. Now our time, real good time. Now our time, a real good time. Now our time, now our time, a real good time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, baby of mine. Do do do do do do, baby. Do do do do do do, I can fly, yeah. Sell me something big and untamed. Now our time, real good time. Now our time, a real good time. Now our time, said now our time, a real good time. It’s a really good time, baby of mine.”
Evan jumped off the chairs and ran back to the front of the choir room.
“Feel good, real good, it’s the same old saying. Real good, feel good, don’t got no more brains. Feel good, real good, it’s the same old saying, yeah. Feel good, real good, I don’t got no more brain, baby of mine.”
“And just like that, Evan becomes a stripper,” Aldy said.
Will shook his head as he looked back at Sue who shoved a fistful of dollars back into her pocket.
“Sue!” Will said.
“I’ve seen his records, Will. He’s eighteen and I’m only human,” Sue replied.
“I appreciate the effort, Evan,” Jaxon said. “Really, I do. But it just doesn’t feel like the fun is gonna come back to Glee Club. Pardon the Pink reference, but seeing as we are paying tribute to her, this place used to be a funhouse. Now it’s just full of evil clowns.”
“Did my little sister put make-up on me while I asleep again?” Kevin asked, looking at Rose.
Miles slapped Kevin the back of the head. “No, dummy. It’s a simile.”
“Assembly?” Kevin asked. “But they never announced it during the school announcements.”
Miles sighed in frustration. “Someone else, please explain.”
“It means when you use like or as to compare something to something else,” Nicole explained. “That’s a simile. It’s derived from the term similar.”
“Oh,” Kevin replied. “Why didn’t you just say so?”
“Oh, I’m about to smack him again,” Miles said.
“Calm down,” Taylor said. “Kevin is just Kevin, Miles. It’s nothing to get so frustrated about.”
“I’m sorry,” Miles said. “I haven’t been the same since I found out that Nicole was being abused by Dillon. It makes me think about my stepfather and how I worry that he might hurt my mom one of these days. And then Lana tried to kill herself and I still haven’t gotten over John’s suicide. It just causes all these emotions in me.”
“Sorry,” Lana said hastily. “Next time I feel like killing myself, for your sake alone, I will rethink it.”
“Lana, please,” Hallie said.
“See what I mean?” Jaxon said. “Glee Club is falling apart.”
Jaxon stood alone on the empty stage in the April Rhodes Civic Pavilion. He looked out into the all the seats, thinking.
This is my dream, he thought. Standing on stage, performing. But it’s gonna be over soon. One little action could end it all. Whatever happened to the hope and optimism that Glee Club used to stand for? What happened to the days when we could go to Glee Club and have fun? What happened to the days when we could still manage to hold on to our dreams?
Jaxon sighed as he walked over and turned on his boom box. The music to “Funhouse” began to play.
“I dance around this empty house, tear us down, throw you out,” Jaxon sang. “Screaming down the halls, spinning all around and now we fall. Pictures framing up the past, your taunting smirk behind the glass. This museum full of ash, once a tickle, now a rash. This used to be a funhouse but now it's full of evil clowns. It's time to start the countdown. I'm gonna burn it down, down, down. I'm gonna burn it down. Nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one—fun.”
The side door opened and Evan walked in, watching Jaxon perform.
“Echoes knocking on locked doors, all the laughter from before. I'd rather live out on the street than in this haunted memory. I've called the movers, called the maids. We'll try to exorcise this place. Drag my mattress to the yard, crumble tumble house of cards. This used to be a funhouse but now it's full of evil clowns. It's time to start the countdown. I'm gonna burn it down, down, down. I'm gonna burn it down.”
Evan walked closer to the stage, his backpack slung over his shoulder.
“This used to be a funhouse but now it's full of evil clowns. It's time to start the countdown. I'm gonna burn it down, down, down. I'm gonna burn it down. Nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one—fun. Oh, I'm crawling through the doggy door. My key don't fit my lock no more. I'll change the drapes, I'll break the plates, I'll find a new place. Burn this sucker down. Do do do do do do. Do do do do do do. Do do do do do do. Do do do do da da da da. Do do do do do do. Nine, eight, seven, six, five, four, three, two, one. Do do do do do do. Do do do do do do. Do do do do do do. This used to be a funhouse but now it's full of evil clowns. It's time to start the countdown. I'm gonna burn it down, down, down. I'm gonna burn it down. This used to be a funhouse but now it's full of evil clowns. It's time to start the countdown. I'm gonna burn it down, down, down. I'm gonna burn it down.”
“That was great,” Evan said, clapping. “I’m sorry that’s how you feel, Jaxon.”
“Glee Club, it’s dying, Evan,” Jaxon said as he ran his hand through his hair. “I want to try and save it, but it’s useless.”
“No,” Evan said. “It’s not. The issue here is not with Glee Club, and I think you know it. It’s with Lana. You’re mad at her, but you don’t wanna be. You saw her on that ledge, ready to kill herself and you’re still mad at her.”
“I feel betrayed, Evan,” Jaxon said. “If she was having such a horrible time, why couldn’t she confide in me? I’m supposed to be one of her best friends and she wouldn’t even let me be there for her. It’s like a knife in the back.”
“At least we know where you’re coming from, now,” Evan said. “And we can address the real problem.”
“What kind of friend would I be if I sat in there and told her how I really feel?” Jaxon asked.
“A true friend,” Evan said. “Because true friends are always honest, even if it hurts.”
“The thing is, Evan,” Jaxon said, “I’m not sure if I still wanna be her friend. All I did was try to be there for her and what did I get? Ignored and pushed aside. And the thing is, Lana knows I would have been there for her, like always.”
“You’re always there when we need you,” Evan said. “But I think Lana’s emotionally and mentally in the same place I was after the whole Legacy thing. What she needs right now is some tough love to snap her out of it, just like I needed.”
Evan turned around and started toward the exit.
“Where are you going?” Jaxon asked.
“To talk to Lana,” Evan answered. “I’ll see you later.”
Lana stood in front of her locker, zoned out as she flashed back to her first day back at school.
As Lana made her way to the bathroom, on her way to find a mirror, she listened to all the things the other students said.
“That Lana is so weird,” a boy said. “But can you believe about Nicole? Her boyfriend tried to kill her, I heard.”
“Poor Nicole,” a girl said. “She’s my hero, to go through so much and be so strong—such an inspiration.”
“I bet Lana Addison got taken down a few pegs, to just be discarded by her own family lie that,” another girl said. “No wonder that Lynsay girl was crazy. If I had her as a cousin—”
“Oh, could you imagine?” Her friend asked.
Lana stopped walking and looked at the banner over the Brainiacs Club classroom.
WELCOME BACK, NICOLE!
Lana felt like ripping the banner off the wall, but she couldn’t do that to Nicole. But still, it hurt. Nicole was treated as a returning hero and she was the school joke.
She opened the bathroom door and stepped inside, making her way to the sink. She looked up into the mirror.
“Lana?” Bella said.
Lana snapped back to reality and shut her locker. “I’m sorry, Bella. I was just thinking.”
“About Nicole, right?” Bella asked.
“How did you know?” Lana asked.
“You barely talk to her, you roll your eyes whenever people mention her name, and I saw you eyeing her ‘welcome back’ banner the other day,” Bella answered. “You looked hurt.”
“Hmm,” Lana said. “Let me guess, I’m gonna get some of Bella James’ infamous unwanted advice?”
“I know you’re hurting, so I’ll let that remark slide,” Bella responded. “You’re jealous, aren’t you?”
“So what if I am?” Lana asked. “It’s normal to be jealous of people sometimes.”
“But it’s low to be jealous of a girl who was physically abused by her boyfriend,” Bella said.
“You seriously have no idea, Bella,” Lana said.
“What else is there to know?” Bella asked.
“Look, I’d rather be physically abused because those wounds heal quicker,” Lana snapped. “Nicole’s knee will be better in two weeks. I’ll always be messed up.”
“Think for a minute what she went through,” Bella said.
“Think for a minute what I’ve been through!” Lana said. “My own mother disowned me because I reminded her of my dead father. The mother who raised me treated me like crap every day of my life. The man I call my father was never there when I needed him. My cousin tried to steal what little happiness I had away from me. The one person in my life who I feel loves me, isn’t my brother after all. Then, I come back to school and the whole school is treating Nicole like a martyr, but I get treated like the school joke. The same people praising Nicole make fun of me for what I went through. So, yeah, I wish that all that happened to me was Hallie pushed me over a coffee table. Then, I’d be fine in two weeks and I wouldn’t be the school laughing stock.”
Nicole stood off to the side, just out of view, watching and listening. She bowed her head, feeling for Lana.
“Lana, I had no idea about all of that,” Bella said. “I understand where you’re coming from, but still, don’t be jealous of Nicole. Be jealous of the people who have it so much better than both of you, okay?”
Lana nodded. “Yeah, whatever.”
Bella patted Lana on the shoulder. “I’ll see you later, okay?”
Lana started to walk away, but Evan appeared beside her.
“Let’s talk,” Evan said.
“Ugh, what is this?” Lana asked. “National Give Lana Unwanted Advice Day?”
“I’m not here for unwanted advice,” Evan said.
“Thank God,” Lana said with an exhale.
“I’m here to give you tough love,” Evan replied.
“Even worse,” Lana said as she sighed.
“Now, hear me out,” Evan said. “When I had that whole moment when I detached from reality and invented an alter-ego after the Legacy—”
“Evan Zolanski,” Lana mused.
“Yes, well, beside the point,” Evan replied. “Anyway, it was you who gave me some tough love, so I thought that I could repay the favor and give you some, too.”
“No repayment needed,” Lana said. “Your present sanity is enough.”
“I think you should realize that you hurt a lot of people, Lana,” Evan said. “Close friends, even. Try to see this from their point of view and how they feel. Because if you can’t come to terms with how your actions affected them, things will never be better for any of you.”
“Thanks, Evan,” Lana said sarcastically. “This has been great. Could we schedule another meeting for next century? I’m pretty busy for this one.”
Evan rolled his eyes. “What I’m saying is, snap out of it. It’s over, in the past. You need to move on. And if you value your friendship with some people, you need to rectify this before the entire Glee Club suffers.”
Evan looked at Lana for a second before turning around and walking off.
Nicole sat outside in the courtyard, her head hung down. Adam slowly approached her, his hands in his pockets.
“Can we talk, Nicole?” Adam asked.
Nicole nodded. “Sure. Have a seat.”
Nicole scooted down and made room for Adam, who sat down slowly and uneasily at first.
“I wanted to know where we stand,” Adam said. “We can’t ignore that we kissed last week. Since then, neither of us has talked about it, and I’ve racked my mind wondering are we or aren’t we?”
“I don’t know,” Nicole said. “I haven’t even officially broken up with Dillon, yet. I can’t find him to even do so.”
“Nicole, I poured my feelings out to you,” Adam said. “When you kissed me, I know you felt the same way.”
“Adam, another boy who loved me had the same issues that you have,” Nicole explained. “And he eventually killed himself. I couldn’t go through that again.”
“I don’t do this because I want to die,” Adam said. “It’s a coping mechanism. The pain, the stress, the pressure, the fear—it all goes away when I cut.”
“If you read John’s journal, it started out the same way for him, too,” Nicole replied. “And eventually, it cost him his life. If you really love me, then please find another way to cope, Adam. I can’t be with a cutter.”
“Oh,” Adam said, sounding defeated. “Okay. I understand. I’ll just be going now.”
“Adam,” Nicole said as Adam got up and walked off. She sighed as she brushed a lock of hair behind her ear, stood up, and walked in the opposite direction.
Adam walked into the Glee Club classroom, walked over to the shelves where Mr. Schue kept all his books, and began to scan the shelves. Finally, he found it: John’s journal. Adam pulled the large, leather-bound book from the shelf and shoved it into his backpack.
When Adam got home, he hurried up the stairs, ignored his moms asking how his day went, and flung himself down on his bed. He pulled John’s journal out of his backpack, which he threw into the corner after removing the book. He opened it up and began to read to himself.
It started today, he read aloud in his head. I was at football practice and Miles ran in front of me and caught a pass meant for me instead. Of course, he made it across the endzone and was celebrated as a hero. He stole my moment, my glory. And once again, Miles was the big football star and I’m just…no one. I need to find an outlet for all the things that I feel because I can feel them building inside of me. I accidently cut myself on an old locker in the locker room. The adrenaline rush was amazing. But really surprised me is that the pain from the cut numbed my feelings. It made me feel so much more—relieved is the word, I guess—to be able to focus on the physical pain instead of the emotional.
Adam flipped the page.
Talking to Nicole helps, Adam continued to read in his head. I care about her so much. We went to the Star Wars convention together. I was Anakin and she was Amidala. She looked so beautiful. I could never tell her I love her, I’m just too shy. I know, right, the big football stud afraid of talking to a girl? Not just any girl. Nicole. Sure, she was labeled a nerd, but deep down inside, I was, too. She was the only girl who got my jokes and laughed at them. She loves the same movies I love. But she only sees me as a friend. I did some research on the feeling I got from the locker cut. Turns out there is this thing called cutting, it’s like a real thing. They call it a coping mechanism. So I took my pocket knife and cut myself. The rush was amazing, again. I feel better like this is some kind of cheap, secret therapy.
Adam turned the page again.
Miles knows and he started a fight. He’s always pushing my buttons. How did we go from Jaxon, Miles, and John—the three best friends who just so happen to be the most popular guys at McKinley—to this? Barely speaking, always fighting. I had to cut myself three times today just to stop the pain. Each time, it takes more and more cuts. I can’t stop…what do I do? I’m scared and I just want help. But my pride, it won’t let me take the help from Miles no matter how hard he tries. If anything ever happens to me, I just hope he knows he didn’t fail me. I failed myself.
Adam stared at the page, letting the words sink in. He exhaled as he turned to the last entry that John had written.
Mr. Schue is my guardian angel. He saved me, gave me purpose. Glee Club has kept me alive far longer than I expected. With everything that has been going on, Glee Club is a beacon of hope. But I guess eventually, the rolling fog will consume beacon of light and all that’s left is darkness. It’s all pitch black, now.
Adam closed the journal, sitting there in silence for a second before he got up and returned the journal to his backpack. He sat back down, pulling his knees up to his chin as he just sat there, thinking.
Coach Beiste blew her whistle as she put her hands on her hips.
“Get it together, boys!” Beiste shouted. “The regional and national championships are on the line. I’m looking for a very coveted three-peat after taking state so easily.”
“It’s Conrad,” Miles said. “He’s not doing a good job of blocking, so I get eat up every time I get the ball!”
“Sure,” Conrad replied. “Put the blame all on me. There’s half a dozen other people blocking, not just me.”
“Enough!” Beiste said. “That was the sorriest excuse for a practice I have ever seen! All of you hit the showers!”
Jaxon shook his head as he watched Miles and Conrad walk toward the locker room. He took his helmet off and followed them.
“That was BS out there,” Miles said, looking at Conrad. “You let him through and he tackled me.”
“If you had been paying attention, you could have avoided him,” Conrad said.
Miles threw his helmet down on the ground as he angrily stripped off his jersey and pads.
“Look at Miles,” Conrad told his friend. “All butt-hurt because he ate a little turf today.”
“Why don’t you shut your face, Conrad?” Miles asked as he turned around, grabbed Conrad, and slammed him against the lockers. “Let’s see how you like eating some tiles after I’m done with you!”
“Miles!” Jaxon said, pushing himself between Miles and Conrad. “Stop it. Geez, what has gotten into you?”
“Miles’ boyfriend is coming to break up the fight,” Conrad said, laughing.
Miles pushed Jaxon, who fell backwards and slid backwards for a few feet. Miles turned back around and reared back his fist, ready to hit Conrad. Instead, he punched the locker beside him. Conrad flinched as Miles’ fist hit the locker with a loud thud. Miles looked Conrad in the eyes for a moment before letting him go.
“You’re lucky, punk,” Miles said.
Jaxon looked up at Miles, shocked. Miles grabbed his towel and started toward the showers.
The next day, the seating arrangement in Glee Club was quite different. Jaxon, James and Hallie sat together. Lana sat beside Hallie, who was on James’ right. It felt very different for Lana to sit here instead of sitting beside Jaxon with Hallie on her left. Miles no longer sat behind Jaxon and Lana with Taylor on his right. They now sat in the back row.
“The seating has changed,” Will said. “The tension in the air is so thick you can cut it with a knife. Someone must be having a fight.”
Miles and Jaxon didn’t say anything. They tried their best to not even acknowledge each other.
James raised his hand. “To help cut the awkward silence short, can I perform my song?”
“By all means,” Will said, taking his seat.
James walked to the front of the choir room and said something to the band before he pulled a stool front and center and sat down on it.
“Never win first place, I don't support the team,” James sang. “I can't take direction and my socks are never clean. Teachers dated me, my parents hated me. I was always in a fight ‘cause I can't do nothing right. Every day I fight a war against the mirror. I can't take the person staring back at me. I'm a hazard to myself. Don't let me get me. I'm my own worst enemy. It’s bad when you annoy yourself. So irritating, don't wanna be my friend no more. I wanna be somebody else. I wanna be somebody else, yeah.”
Jaxon watched as James sang, enthralled by his voice and empathetic to what he was singing about. Hallie reached over and patted Jaxon’s hand.
“L.A. told me, ‘you'll be a pop star. All you have to change is everything you are.’ Tired of being compared to damn Britney Spears. She's so pretty, that just ain't me. Doctor, doctor won't you please prescribe me something? A day in the life of someone else? ‘Cause I'm a hazard to myself. Don't let me get me. I'm my own worst enemy. It’s bad when you annoy yourself. So irritating, don't wanna be my friend no more. I wanna be somebody else. Don't let me get me. I'm my own worst enemy. It’s bad when you annoy yourself. So irritating, don't wanna be my friend no more. I wanna be somebody else.”
Miles averted his eyes from James, feeling like the song expressed how he really felt a little too much—so much so that it made him uncomfortable.
“Doctor, doctor won't you please prescribe me something? A day in the life of someone else? Don't let me get me. I’m a hazard to myself, yeah. Don't let me get me. I'm my own worst enemy. It’s bad when you annoy yourself, yourself. So irritating, so irritating, don't wanna be my friend no more. Don’t, don’t, I wanna be somebody else. Don’t let, don’t let, don’t let me get me. It’s bad, it’s so bad. Don’t wanna be my friend no more. I wanna be somebody else.”
“Great choice of song,” Will said. “But why did you choose that song, if you don’t mind me asking?”
“The great thing about Pink’s music is that she has at least one song that everyone can say is their anthem, their theme song,” James said. “This is mine. I’ve always felt like my own worst enemy. I think that is something a lot of people can relate to. I’ve suffered self-esteem issues in the past and I only have myself to blame. I almost pushed away the love of my life. I guess the darkness and depression of Glee Club here lately reminded me of that.”
Taylor waited outside Glee Club for Ana and Natasha, who walked into the hallway, hand-in-hand.
“There’s work to be done,” Taylor said.
“I thought you were being nice to New Directions, now,” Natasha said.
“I am,” Taylor said. “I made peace with New Directions during Freaky Friday week or whatever you call it. Instead, I’m directing my meanness to more deserving students now.”
“Like who?” Ana asked.
“Watch and see, girls,” Taylor said, a smirk on her face.
Miles walked past them and down the hall. As he passed Conrad, he shoved him into the lockers. Conrad turned around and started after Miles, but Aldy grabbed him.
“Calm down, bro,” Aldy said. “Let me handle this.”
Aldy started toward Miles, grabbed his shoulder, and turned Miles to face him.
“Just who do you think you are?” Aldy asked.
“I’m trouble,” Miles said.
“That’s the cue, ladies,” Taylor said, starting a song on her iPhone.
“Let’s do this,” Natasha said.
“No attorneys to plead my case,”Taylor sang as made her way toward Miles and Aldy. “No opiates to send me into outer space. And my fingers are bejeweled with diamonds and gold but that ain't gonna help me now.”
“I'm trouble, yeah trouble now,” Taylor, Miles, Ana, and Natasha sang as Ana and Natasha began to dance in circles around the others. “I'm trouble y'all, I disturb my own town. I'm trouble, yeah, trouble now. I'm trouble y'all, I got trouble in my town.”
“You think you're right, but you were wrong,” Miles sang. “You tried to take me, but I knew all along. You can't take me for a ride. I'm not a fool now, so you better run and hide.”
“I'm trouble, yeah trouble now,” they four of them sang as Aldy joined in. “I'm trouble y'all, I got trouble my own town. I'm trouble, yeah, trouble now. I'm trouble y'all, I got trouble in my town.”
“If you see me coming down the street,” Ana and Natasha sang as they put their hands on Aldy’s chest and gently walked him backwards towards the lockers. “Then you know it's time to go. Hey, you know it's time to go. And you know it's time to go ‘cause here comes trouble.”
“No attorneys to plead my case,”Taylor sang. “No opiates, to send me into outer space. And my fingers are bejeweled with diamonds and gold but that ain't gonna help me now.”
“You think you're right, but you were wrong,” Aldy sang, as he pushed past Ana and Natasha to get up in Miles’ face. “You tried to take me, but I knew all along. You can't take me for a ride. Well, I'm not a fool now, so you better run and hide.”
“Mmm trouble, yeah trouble now,” they all sang. “I'm trouble y'all, I disturb my town. I'm trouble, yea, trouble now. I'm trouble y'all, I got trouble in my town.”
“So if you see me coming down the street, then you know it's time to go, go, go,”Ana and Natasha sang as they laced their arms through Aldy’s and pulled him toward Conrad.
“Well I've got trouble, yeah, trouble now,” they all sang. “I'm trouble y'all, I got trouble in my town. I'm trouble, yeah, trouble now. I'm trouble y'all, I got trouble in my town. I'm trouble, yeah trouble now. I'm trouble y'all, I got trouble in my town. I'm trouble, yeah, trouble now. I'm trouble y'all, I got trouble in my town, yeah.”
“I'm trouble in my town, yeah, yeah,”Miles sang.
“I'm trouble in my town, yeah, yeah,”Aldy sang.
Taylor snapped her fingers. “Slushies, now!” She barked.
A slushie was quickly shoved into each of her hands as she slinked over to Aldy and Conrad. She threw them in their faces and laughed as purple slush dripped off their shocked faces. Taylor laced her arm through Miles and they walked down the hall together, Ana and Natasha following.
“I thought we were gonna be nice to New Directions,” Natasha said. “But you slushied Aldy.”
“That wasn’t part of the plan,” Taylor said. “But he’s the one who got himself drug into that when he jumped in.”
Jaxon knocked on Adam’s door, waiting for an answer. Finally, Abby opened the door.
“Hi,” Abby said. “Friend of Lana or Adam, I assume.”
“Both,” Jaxon said. “But I’m actually here to see Lana.”
“Then come on in,” Abby said. “Make yourself at home while I go get her.
“Thanks,” Jaxon said.
“Surely a boy as strapping and handsome as you has a girlfriend,” Abby said, attempting to make small talk.
“Fiancé,” Jaxon said. “We’re getting married this summer.”
“Ooh, young love,” Abby said as she shut the door behind Jaxon. “Lucky girl.”
“Lucky boy,” Jaxon replied.
“Oh, you’re gay?” Abby said. “Then you should feel right at home. This is a very accepting house, just as I raised my son to be accepting of others. Have a seat. And I’m sorry, I didn’t catch your name.”
“Jaxon,” Jaxon replied.
“I’ll send Lana right down, Jaxon,” Abby said.
“Thank you,” Jaxon said as he took a seat on the sofa and waited.
“Jaxon?” Lana asked as she walked down the staircase. “What are you doing here?”
“I wanted to talk to you,” Jaxon said.
Lana looked surprised. “Oh? What about?”
“I think that we need to try and work things about between us, Lana,” Jaxon said. “Right now, we’re both hurting and there is so much anger—”
“I’m not angry,” Lana said.
“I am,” Jaxon replied. “I’m angry that you ignored me. I’m angry that you wouldn’t let me be there for you. And most of all, I’m angry that you tried to kill yourself. What were you thinking?”
“You wouldn’t understand, Jaxon,” Lana said. “So why does it matter?”
“It matters because you’re one of my best friends and I care about you. That’s why.”
“When I was on that ledge, I had a lot of time to think,” Lana said. “Truth is, I heard whispers in my head and they told me that one cared about me. They pushed me to that ledge and would have let me fall.”
“You should know that’s lies, Lana,” Jaxon said. “You should know that we all care about you. I can’t speak for your family, but you know the truth as far as your friends are concerned. I wouldn’t have let you fall. Even if it killed me, I would have risked my life to catch you and break your fall.”
“I didn’t wanna put any more on you, Jaxon,” Lana replied. “You had just lost your dad and I know that still hurts—”
“And you think that it would hurt me any less to be burying you next?” Jaxon asked.
Lana looked down at the floor, not sure of what to say. She found herself at a loss for words.
“I should just go,” Jaxon said. “I don’t want to hurt our friendship anymore. It already feels like it’s on life support as it is.”
Jaxon stood up and started to the door.
“Jaxon, wait,” Lana said. It was too late. The door shut behind Jaxon, leaving her all alone.
Adam sat on his bed, wearing a pair of baggy-legged pajama bottoms. He looked over at the clock. It read 12:24. He sighed, wishing he could go back to sleep.
“Adam, right?” A voice said.
Adam looked up to find a guy, his own age, standing at the foot of his bed. He had spiked, blonde hair and wore a McKinley Titans letterman jacket.
“Yes,” Adam said, looking around. “How did you get in?”
“Ghosts don’t need a means of getting in,” the boy replied. “We just appear.”
“Ghost?” Adam asked, eyeing his backpack. “Are you John?”
“In the flesh,” John said. “Or actually, I should say, in the ectoplasm.”
“What are you doing here?” Adam asked.
“You read my journal because you were looking for something, no?” John asked. “You unwittingly opened a portal through the journal that brought me here to help you.”
“Help me?” Adam asked. “With?”
John stuck his hand out and Adam felt an invisible force turning his bare arm over, exposing his pink razor scars.
“You cut yourself, too,” John said.
“But I don’t do it because I want to kill myself,” Adam said.
“Who are you trying to convince?” John asked. “Me or yourself? Because it doesn’t seem like you’re trying to convince me. Especially considering that ghosts already know the truth.”
“I really don’t,” Adam said.
“But if you loved yourself, you wouldn’t do that,” John said. “I didn’t love myself and eventually, when the effects of cutting weren’t enough, I couldn’t deal anymore and I did something so drastic that I’m here talking to you today in astral form.”
“That’s why you’re here? To help me?” Adam asked.
“Ghosts have unfinished business,” John said. “My unfinished business is Nicole. I loved her more than anything and all I want for her is to be happy. She’s not happy and she will only be happy if you stop this, Adam. She loves you and she deserves so much better than she’s gotten in the past. I have to ensure you stop so that she can get her happily ever after.”
“What do I do?” Adam asked.
“Throw it all away, in the garbage. Tell your mothers about it and get help, Adam. You have to. It’s time to stop hiding and it’s time to stop making excuses. You don’t need this crutch, Adam.”
Adam looked down at his scars and then back at John, but he was gone. Adam jumped straight up out of his bed, in a cold sweat. He realized that it had all been a dream. He laid back down, thinking for a moment.
After a few moments, Adam got up and took out his cutting kit. He walked over to the trashcan in the corner and threw it inside.
Lana and Hallie walked down the hall together, holding hands. Yes, they were still together but things had changed. Even now, they barely spoke to one another. Truth was, Hallie didn’t even know what to say if she were to even address it.
“Don’t you have a meeting of the God Squad after Glee Club today?” Lana asked.
“I do,” Hallie said. “But I’m not going.”
“Why not?” Lana asked. “You love God Squad.”
“When you climbed to that rooftop, I did a lot of thinking,” Hallie said. “And I did a lot of questioning. I found myself questioning God and my faith which surprised me. My faith has always been strong unshakable. And in one fell swoop, it was shaken.”
“You’ll find your faith again, Hallie,” Lana said. “Look I need to go to my locker. I’ll see you in Glee Club.”
“Bye,” Hallie said.
“I love you,” Lana said.
“You too,” Hallie said.
Hallie watched as Lana walked down the hall. She turned around and started in the opposite direction.
“I've been the girl with her skirt pulled high,” Hallie sang. “Been the outcast never running with mascara eyes. Now I see the world as a candy store, with a cigarette smile, saying things you can't ignore. Like Mommy, I love you. Daddy, I hate you. Brother, I need you. Lover, hey, screw you. I can see everything here with my third eye, like the blue in the sky.”
As Hallie sang, she hugged her books tightly to her chest, walking down the hall.
“If God is a DJ, life is a dance floor. Love is the rhythm, you are the music. If God is a DJ, life is a dance floor. You get what you're given, it's all how you use it. I've been the girl, middle finger in the air, unaffected by rumors, the truth: I don't care. So open your mouth and stick out your tongue. You might as well let go, you can't take back what you've done. So find a new lifestyle, a new reason to smile. Look for Nirvana under the strobe lights. Sequins and sex dreams, you whisper to me there's no reason to cry.”
Hallie rounded the corner and walked into the choir room. She stopped in the middle of the floor, singing.
“If God is a DJ, life is a dance floor. Love is the rhythm, you are the music. If God is a DJ, life is a dance floor. You get what you're given, it's all how you use it. You take what you get and you get what you give. I say don't run from yourself, man, that's no way to live. I've got a record in my bag, you should give it a spin. Lift your hands in the air so that life can begin. If God Is a DJ, if God. If God is a DJ, life is a dance floor. Get your ass on the dance floor. If God is a DJ, life is a dance floor. Love is the rhythm, you are the music. If God is a DJ, life is a dance floor. You get what you're given, it's all how you use it.”
“That was quite an entrance, Hallie,” Will said.
Hallie smiled slightly as she walked over and took her seat beside Lana.
Nicole sat alone in the choir room after everyone else had left, thinking to herself and staring at the small box and envelope that Dillon had sent her in the mail. No return address…no one even knew where Dillon was now. All that they knew is that he was no longer in his apartment that his parents paid for. Likely, he went home to his parents, but no one in the Warblers knew where that would be.
“What’s that?” Bella asked as she walked in, followed by Honey and Rose.
“Something Dillon sent me,” Nicole said. “As an apology I guess. I haven’t opened it yet.”
“Don’t,” Honey said.
“Sure you’re not gonna take him back,” Rose said.
“No,” Nicole said. “But I can’t help but wonder what’s in here.”
“You’re opening yourself up to more hurt,” Bella said.
“I know,” Nicole said. “But if I never open it, I will always wonder. At least if I open it, I can say no.”
Nicole pulled the bow off the bow and opened it up to reveal a beautiful golden locket in the shape of a heart. There were eleven small diamonds at the criss cross intersections in the face. Bella’s eyes went wide.
“I’ve seen those before,” she said. “They’re twelve hundred dollar lockets, Nicole.”
“Don’t go back to him just because of an expensive gift,” Rose said. “So what, he’s rich and buys flashy gifts. He’s also a cretin who hits on and pushes girls around whenever he gets stressed.”
“Listen to them,” Honey said. “Adam may not be that rich, but he loves you and he’s been there the entire time.”
“Love isn’t about the flashy gifts or what they can buy for you,” Bella said. “It’s about devotion and Adam has been hopeless devoted to you for over a year now.”
“I know,” Nicole said, eyeing the small card inside the box.
No matter what you decide, it’s yours to keep.
If you wanna know where to find me, the answer is in
the envelope along with my sincere apologies. Love, Dillon.
Bella stepped forward, her hands on her hips.
“I never cared too much for love,” Bella sang. “It was all a bunch of mush that I just did not want. Paid was the issue of the day. If a girlfriend's got some game, couldn't be more fly, getting paid was everything. But I'm not every girl and I don't need that world to validate me. ‘Cause shorty's got a job, shorty's got a car, shorty can pay her own rent. Don't wanna dance if it is not in my heart.”
Honey and Rose began to dance behind Bella, vocalizing.
“Most girls want a man with the bling-bling. Got my own thing, got the ching-ching. I just want real love. Most girls want a man with the mean green. Don't wanna dance if he can't be everything that I dream of, a man that understands real love. I was a girl about the floss. It was all about the cost, how much he spent on me. Seek, for a man who's got the means to be giving you diamond rings. It's what every fly girl could want or even dream. But I'm not every girl and I don't need no G to take care of me. ‘Cause shorty's got a job, shorty's got a car, shorty can pay her own rent. Don't wanna dance if it is not in my heart, no no.”
Bella broke out into dance, joining Honey and Rose as they performed a dance routine. Nicole looked down at the locket, thinking.
“But I'm not every girl and I don't need no G to take care of me, no. ‘Cause shorty's got a job, shorty's got a car, shorty can pay her own rent. Don't wanna dance if it is not in my heart, oh most girls. Most girls want a man with the bling-bling. Got my own thing, got the ching-ching. I just want real love. Most girls want a man with the mean green. Don't wanna dance if he can't be everything that I dream of, a man that understands real love. Bling-bling, got my own. Real love, don’t wanna dance if he can’t be everything I dream of, a man that understand real. ‘Cause I’m not most girls. Don’t wanna dance if he can’t be, oh, everything. Real love, just want real love. Everything I dream of.”
As the song ended, Nicole stood up and put the locket in her pocket.
“After everything I think I deserve it,” Nicole said. “Doesn’t mean I want him back.”
Nicole walked past Bella, Honey, and Rose and threw the card and the envelope in the trash can.
“I know who I wanna be with,” Nicole said. “And it’s not Dillon.”
Adam sat at the piano in Will’s Spanish classroom, tinkling the keys of Will’s purple piano as he thought to himself. Nicole stopped in the doorway, looking at him.
“Adam?” She asked, easing into the classroom.
“Nicole?” Adam asked, turning to face her.
“Can I join you?” Nicole asked.
“Sure,” Adam said. “I was just messing around on the piano.”
Nicole walked in and joined Adam, who slid down on the piano bench to allow room for Nicole to sit.
“I thought about what you said,” Adam said. “About me cutting and everything. I know it’s crazy, but John’s ghost paid me a visit last night in my dreams. And he told me that his unfinished business was to see you happy and he had to make that happen.”
“John visited you, you think?” Nicole asked, confused. “Sometimes dreams can seem vivid and real, Adam.”
“It was real,” Adam said. “Well, the result of it was at least. I threw my cutter’s tools in the garbage last night.”
“You really did?” Nicole asked.
“Yes, and I’m going to start going to a rehabilitation program for cutters every Tuesday night and on weekends,” Adam added. “And I’m gonna come clean to rest of Glee Club about it.”
“Are you nervous about telling them your secret?” Nicole asked.
“Yeah,” Adam said. “I don’t expect people to understand. It’s okay, though. I’ve spent my life misunderstood. For a whole year, everyone thought I was gay.”
Nicole laughed. “People think I’m this huge super nerd. I mean, I’m smart and I have geek tendencies but that isn’t all I am. I think I’m pretty normal.”
“Then we’re a perfect match,” Adam said. “Both unjustly misunderstood.”
Nicole smiled as she began to tap a beat on the side of the piano. Adam looked at her, raising an eyebrow.
“I might be the way everybody likes to say,” Nicole sang as she continued to tap the beat. “I know what you're thinking about me. There might be a day you might have a certain way but you don't have my luxuries.”
“And it’s me, I know I know my name ‘cause I say it proud,” Adam sang. “Everything I want, I always do. Looking for the right track, always on the wrong track, but are you're catching all these tracks that I'm laying down for you?”
“There's a song I was listening to up all night,” Adam and Nicole sang as Adam joined in on the piano. “There's a voice I am hearing saying it’s alright. When I'm happy, I'm sad, but everything is good. It’s not that complicated, I'm just misunderstood.”
“There might be a day everything, it goes my way,” Adam sang. “Can't you think I know I'm super fly? I might see the world in a world inside of you, then I just might say goodbye.”
“And it’s my name I know, I say it loud ‘cause I'm really proud of all the things I used to do,” Nicole sang. “’Cause it’s the wrong track, looking for the right track, and are you're catching all these tracks that I'm laying down for you?”
“There's a song I was listening to up all night,” Adam and Nicole sang. “There's a voice I am hearing saying it’s alright. When I'm happy, I'm sad, but everything is good. Its not that complicated I'm just misunderstood.”
“Yeah, yeah, yeah,”Nicole sang.
“Looking for the right track, always on the wrong track,” Adam sang.
“But all you're catching are these tracks that I'm laying down for you?”Nicole sang.
“There's a song I was listening to up all night,”Adam and Nicole sang. “There's a voice I am hearing saying it’s alright. I was taken for granted but it’s all good. ‘Cause I'll do it again, I'm just misunderstood. Said I'll do it again, I'm just misunderstood. I said I'll do it again, I'm just misunderstood. I said I'll do it again, I'm just misunderstood.”
As the song ended, Nicole leaned in and pressed her lips to Adam’s. As they broke the kiss, Adam looked confused.
“What does this kiss mean?” Adam said.
“That I love you,” Nicole said. “Thanks for always being there for me, Adam. And, I’m sorry it took so long for me to realize that I loved you, too.”
The next day in Glee Club, Honey and Rose cut smiles in Nicole’s direction as she and Adam sat together, holding hands.
“Anybody else have a Pink song they’d like to do?” Will asked, looking around the room. Both and Miles’ and Lana’s hands shot up.
“Looks like we have volunteers,” Will said.
“Go on,” Miles said. “Don’t want you to get upset and jump off a bridge because you went last.”
“Miles,” Will scolded.
“No, by all means, you go first,” Lana replied. “Spoiled Miles, used to getting his way—wouldn’t want to mess that up.”
“How about we have a sing-off, then?” Miles asked, standing up.
“You’re on,” Lana said.
“Na na na na na na na na na na na na,”Miles sang as he walked to the front of the choir room.
“Na na na na na na na na na na na na,”Lana sang as she joined Miles, circling him.
“I guess I just lost my best friend,” Miles sang. “I don't know where she went. So I'm gonna drink my money, I'm not gonna pay your rent. I got a brand new attitude and I'm gonna wear it tonight. I wanna get in trouble, I wanna start a fight.”
“Na na na na na na na,”Lana sang.
“I wanna start a fight,”Miles sang.
“Na na na na na na na,”Lana sang.
“I wanna start a fight,”Miles sang.
“So, so what?” Miles and Lana sang as they glared at one another. “I'm still a rock star. I got my rock moves and I don't need you. And guess what? I'm having more fun and now that we’re done, I'm gonna show you tonight. I'm alright, I'm just fine, and you're a tool. So, so what? I am a rock star. I got my rock moves and I don't want you tonight.”
“Uh check my flow,”Miles sang.
“The waiter just took my table and gave it to Jessica Simps,” Lana sang, sizing Miles up. “I guess I'll go sit with drum boy, at least he'll know how to hit. What if this song's on the radio? Then somebody's gonna die. I'm gonna get in trouble, my ex will start a fight.”
“Na na na na na na na,”Miles sang.
“She's gonna start a fight,”Lana sang.
“Na na na na na na na,”Miles sang.
“We're all gonna get in a fight,”Lana sang.
“So, so what?” Miles and Lana sang as circled one another again. “I'm still a rock star. I got my rock moves and I don't need you. And guess what? I'm having more fun and now that we’re done, I'm gonna show you tonight. I'm alright, I'm just fine, and you're a tool. So, so what? I am a rock star. I got my rock moves and I don't want you tonight.”
“You weren't there,” Lana sang. “You never were. You want it all, but that's not fair.”
“I gave you life,” Miles sang. “I gave my all.”
“You weren't there,”Lana sang. “You let me fall.”
“So, so what?” Miles and Lana sang as they glared at one another. “I'm still a rock star. I got my rock moves and I don't need you. And guess what? I'm having more fun and now that we’re done, I'm gonna show you tonight. I'm alright, I'm just fine, and you're a tool. So, so what? I am a rock star. I got my rock moves and I don't want you tonight. No, no, no, no. I don't want you tonight. You weren't there. I'm gonna show you tonight. I'm alright, and you're a tool. So, so what? I am a rock star. I got my rock moves and I don't want you tonight.”
Miles glared at Lana before he turned around and stormed back to his chair. Jaxon looked at Lana, the back at Miles.
Lana sat alone in the courtyard, propped up against the stair rail, thinking. She heard footsteps approaching and turned to face Nicole, who was walking toward her.
“The other day I heard what you said about being jealous of me,” Nicole said.
“I really don’t mean you any ill will,” Lana said.
“I know,” Nicole said. “The thing is, I understand you and where you were coming from. I don’t blame you one bit. But can I tell you a little secret?”
“Sure,” Lana said, nodding.
“I’ve always been jealous of you Lana. You get all the best solos, you’re fierce, confident, strong, independent—everything I wish I could be.”
“I’m none of that,” Lana said. “I let myself get so broken I almost jumped off a roof, Nicole.”
“You’re only human,” Nicole said. “You’re still all of those things. No one is perfect.”
“I was still pretty low to be jealous of you and what you had went through,” Lana replied.
“Truth is I agree with you,” Nicole said. “Emotional wounds take longer to heal, but I do have them, too. Dillon has been my boyfriend for two years, now. But the thing is, I think we’re more alike than we both care to admit.”
“Imagine that,” Lana said with a smile.
“I think it’s time we say goodbye to those who hurt us in the past,” Nicole said. “Lay that whole chapter of our lives to rest.”
“Let me guess,” Lana said. “With a Pink song?”
“It is Pink week,” Nicole answered, smiling. “Unless you don’t want to.”
“I’d be honored to duet with you,” Lana said. “I’ve been wanting to for a while now. At least we have an excuse, now.”
Nicole nodded. “That we do.”
“White knuckles and sweaty palms from hanging on too tight,” Lana sang. “Clenched shut jaw, I've got another headache again tonight. Eyes on fire, eyes on fire, and they burn from all the tears. I've been crying, I've been crying, I've been dying over you. Tie a knot in the rope, trying to hold, trying to hold, but there's nothing to grasp so I let go.”
“I think I've finally had enough, I think I maybe think too much,” Lana and Nicole sang. “I think this might be it for us, blow me one last kiss. You think I'm just too serious, I think you're full of crap. My head is spinning so blow me one last kiss. Just when it can't get worse, I've had a crap day. Have you had a crap day? We've had a crap day. I think that life's too short for this, I want back my ignorance and bliss. I think I've had enough of this, blow me one last kiss.”
“I won't miss all of the fighting that we always did,” Nicole sang. “Take it in, I mean what I say when I say there is nothing left. No more sick whiskey chick, no more battles for me. You'll be calling a trick, 'cause you'll no longer sleep. I'll dress nice, I'll look good, I'll go dancing alone. I will laugh, I'll get drunk, I'll take somebody home.”
“I think I've finally had enough, I think I maybe think too much,” Lana and Nicole sang. “I think this might be it for us, blow me one last kiss. You think I'm just too serious, I think you're full of crap. My head is spinning so blow me one last kiss. Just when it can't get worse, I've had a crap day. Have you had a crap day? We've had a crap day. I think that life's too short for this, I want back my ignorance and bliss. I think I've had enough of this, blow me one last kiss.”
Nicole reached down and took Lana’s hand, holding it tightly as she smiled at her friend.
“Blow me one last kiss,”Lana sang.
“Blow me one last kiss,”Nicole sang.
“I will do what I please, anything that I want,” Lana sang. “I will breathe, I will breathe, I won't worry at all.”
“You will pay for your sins, you'll be sorry my dear,” Nicole sang. “All the lies, all the why's, will all be crystal clear.”
“I think I've finally had enough, I think I maybe think too much,”Lana and Nicole sang. “I think this might be it for us, blow me one last kiss. You think I'm just too serious, I think you're full of crap. My head is spinning so blow me one last kiss. Just when it can't get worse, I've had a crap day. Have you had a crap day? We've had a crap day. I think that life's too short for this, I want back my ignorance and bliss. I think I've had enough of this, blow me one last kiss. Blow me one last kiss. Blow me one last kiss.”
As the song ended, Nicole reached over and hugged Lana, holding her for a moment.
“We’ll be alright,” Nicole said. “We’ll be okay.”
“You think?” Lana asked.
“I’m positive,” Nicole replied. “Oh, I almost forgot why I came here in the first place. This is from Jaxon. He says to read it immediately. It’s important.”
Nicole handed Lana a folded sheet of paper before she turned around and walked off. Lana eyed the paper, then carefully unfolded it.
Meet me in the auditorium ASAP.
Lana walked into the auditorium, which was pitch black. All of a sudden, the spotlights came on and Jaxon stood center stage. Lana looked around and saw that James, Miles, and Hallie were also walking, each one from a different one of the exits.
“I guess you wondered why I asked you all here,” Jaxon said. “I think that our little clique, as well as Glee Club is about to fall in around us and we have to save it. We aren’t gonna be afforded a lot of moments to do so, so consider this do or die.”
“Just how do you expect us to fix this?” Miles asked. “Are we gonna sing about it?”
Lana felt a little insulted at Miles’ insulting and sarcastic tone.
“Exactly,” Jaxon said. “We’ve all been through hell, there’s no denying that. So why not sing about it? Why not sing a song about not letting that get us down? We’re not gonna quit and give up on this. We have a chance to save both our friendships and Glee Club. Let’s do it. If you ever cared about any of the people in this group or ever cared about Glee Club, then get up here and sing your heart out. It’s now or never.”
The band started as Jaxon motioned for four spotlights to come forward and settle on Lana, Miles, James, and Hallie.
“Can't keep me down,” Jaxon sang as each of the other four slowly joined in. “Can't keep me down, down. Can't keep me down, I said you can't keep me down. You know you can't keep me down. I said you can't keep me down.”
“Hey, hey, man! What's your problem?” Jaxon sang. “I see you trying to hurt me bad. Don't know what you're up against.”
“Maybe you should reconsider,” Hallie sang, as she walked toward the stage. “Come up with another plan. ‘Cause you know I'm not that kinda girl that'll lay there and let you come first.”
“You can push me out the window, I'll just get back up,” they all sang. “You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck and I won't give a damn. You can hang me like a slave, I'll go underground. You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but you can't keep me down, down, down, down. Can't keep me down, down. Can't keep me down, down, down. Can't keep me down, down.”
“Hey, hey, girl! Are you ready for today?” Miles sang, as he stepped up on the stage and looked at Lana. “You got your shield and sword? ‘Cause its time to play the games.”
“You are beautiful, even though you’re not for sure,” James sang, joining Jaxon on stage. “Don't let him pull you by the skirt, you're gonna get your feelings hurt.”
“You can push me out the window, I'll just get back up,” all five sang. “You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck and I won't give a damn. You can hang me like a slave, I'll go underground. You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but you can't keep me down, down, down, down. You can push me out the window, I'll just get back up. You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck and I won't give a damn. You can hang me like a slave, I'll go underground. You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but you can't keep me down, down, down, down.”
“Everywhere that I go, there's someone waiting to chain me,” Lana sang as she looked at Jaxon, then Miles. “Everything that I say, there's someone trying to short-change me. I am only this way because of what you have made me and I'm not gonna break!”
“You can push me out the window,” all five sang as they stood still, facing the empty seats, a spotlight on each one. “I'll just get back up. You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck and I won't give a damn. You can hang me like a slave, I'll go underground. You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but you can't keep me down, down, down, down.”
Miles started toward Lana, but Hallie stepped between them. Miles motioned to Hallie to move, but Jaxon grabbed Miles’ arm, trying to stop him. Miles yanked his arm away from Jaxon and continued toward Lana.
“You want the truth?” Miles asked. “I despise you for what you did that night. To climb to that roof and want to kill yourself, knowing what I went through with John’s suicide, that was the biggest knife in my back. I forgive you because I know that I should, but I will never trust you again, Lana. You killed my trust. I trusted you not to pull something stupid in a moment of weakness. I know you think I’m spoiled or self-centered, but have a look in the mirror, Princess. That was the most selfish thing anyone has ever done. Too bad you can’t see that.”
“Miles!” Jaxon said. “Calm down.”
“Stop preaching, Jaxon. Or should I say Schue, Jr.?” Miles spat. “Gosh, enough already! I’m tired of hearing you! I’m tired of all this and I’m tired of her.”
“What are you saying?” James asked.
“I quit your stupid Glee Club,” Miles said. “I’m over all of this bull crap, all this drama, and all the pity parties, preaching, backstabbing—I’m just done with it, okay?”
Miles stormed off the stage and toward the exit, leaving everyone in a stunned silence.
As Evan and Claude walked down the hall together, hand-in-hand, Claude’s text alert went off. Claude pulled out he phone and looked at it. It was Chuck.
Please, come back. Dillon is gone and I can’t do this all alone.
Claude read over the text a few times, trying to process it. Evan looked at Claude, raising an eyebrow.
“What?” Evan asked. “What is it, babe?”
“Nothing,” Claude lied, shoving his phone back into his pocket. “Let’s get to that movie, okay?”
As they started back down the hall, Miles stormed past them, shoving Claude out of the way, nearly knocking him down. Evan looked back at Miles.
“Miles!” He called.
But it was no use, Miles ignored him.